Crimson Heavens

Grandpapa used to hold a good position in Ateneo de Manila University (not as a professor, he worked in the office as the chief accountant or something like that), my Grandmama was having a high position in NAPOCOR long…long…time ago(they never called it NAPOCOR, they always called it “National Power(s)”). For some weird reason, Grandmama retired very early, and Grandpapa, decided to just work as an accountant in our parish church.

Please understand that the house I was raised in was not of a filthy rich family. “Distinguished upper middle class” is probably how I would probably describe it. We were active and very much respected members of the community and our house was quite big. We did have a car–It was a white Ford, if I remember it correctly, which was older than me and was never replaced after it had been bought—two household helps, who most of the time dined with us, and were treated like members of the family. I’m not being an airhead here nor was I saying that we were superior, it was just that we were a bit different (well sorta quite different…)—probably because we had retained some parts of the”colonial” and “old-fashioned” ways… And when I was growing up, I had observed a lot of differences on how “things are done” between my family and other kids’ families.

Both of my grandparents were quite particular, but not too strict. I never had a problem with being forbidden to go out with my friends or anything like that. However, there are certain “no’s” and “should’s” and whoever grew up in that family followed ‘em. Let me give you examples…

1. Playmates and friends were NOT allowed to go upstairs…if they wanna visit, they can roam around whole ground floor. So you have to take all your things downstairs (toys, books, whatever), whatever you might need. You can talk as much as you want, about everything you want, nobody will stand guard and eavesdrop or something like that…The adults will respect your privacy, no matter how young you might be.
2. Any new clothes were to be worn in church first (except house clothes & school uniforms of course).
3. If there are adult visitors in the house, you are not allowed to sit with them in the hall until you are called in.
4. Don’t speak unless spoken to, specially when adults are talking (even if it’s some stupid gossip between the helps…hehehe).
5. The household helps are to be treated with high respect (I got belted…YES! BELTED! for this once).
6. If you’re coming home late, CALL, they won’t mind.
7. Everybody should eat breakfast, lunch and dinner together (if you wanna eat out with your friends, that is fine too, but call, so people won’t wait for you).
8. Food is to be respected, proper manners are to be followed in front of the dining table (no weird noises while eating please…they’re sometimes even particular with how you hold your spoons and forks), and finish everything in your plate. If you don’t like what is being served, do not grumble or ask for anything else.
9. No putting anything not related to food on top of the dining table.
10. Think and re-think before you say or ask anything, make sure you do not offend anybody.
11. No sticking your nose in other people’s business unless they personally ask you for your help. If you think something really “awful” is going on, tell the adults and they’ll see if they can do something.
12. You are responsible for all your actions but you have to think that every action you take not only reflects on you but on your family too, no matter how small it might be.
13. Be proud of your accomplishments…false humility is crap…but don’t be too proud that you think you’re better than everyone else because…
14. There will always be someone better than you, so be humble…

Sometimes I joke to myself that my grandparents had predicted that I’ll end up marrying into an “old” family so they got me all ready for it (except the household chores part…Grandmama got that one wrong, she never wanted me to do household things hehehe…Di daw for me…hanuvahhh). Sure, hubby’s parents weren’t comfortable at all about the idea of the only son/only grandson marrying an “outsider”. They were concerned on how we will be able to adjust to each other’s lifestyle…But hubby said when they finally met me, they were satisfied…Not only I was adorable and sweet (*cough cough*…fine, I added that!)…but because they thought that they sensed, and “saw through me” what kind of “family” I was brought up in…So yey for me!

I miss my Grandmama and Grandpapa. I miss that old house. I miss those times. I do hope that they’re somehow proud of me though, wherever they may be.