Crimson Heavens

Despite of what the title suggests I do not have the talent to write a lyrical poem about Filipino Food. I just simply cannot write poems even if my life depends on it (so much so that if ever I end up in a situation where some twisted poem-loving homicidal maniac tells me to either write verse or die, I’ll just beg my murderer to make my execution quick and painless). But, I do love Filipino Food and that is what I am going to write about.

It really disappoints me that in these three friggin’ years that I am living in this goddarnfersaken country, I still have not yet found a decent Filipino restaurant. Of course again, that’s probably just picky ol’ me. But still, I bet a lot of OFW’s had experienced entering a Filipino restaurant with such high expectations and then leaving the same joint with that “Wotdafrigginhellwasthat?” reaction afterwards. This had happened to me many times already (and to different restaurants too) that I actually avoid going to ANY FILIPINO RESTAURANT to spare myself from utter disappointment.

You see, I adore food. And really, really good food makes me more happy than those heavy-duty bling-blings (I swear, ask the hubby). Of course there are food that I really cannot bring myself to eat…take balut for example…and ‘em lil one-day-old chicks…I’m sorry but they totally do freak me out…And well, siopao…don’t ask, I won’t be able to answer you anyway, I just don’t like it.

As for all time favorites, pork sinigang will always be number one on my list. Nothing can beat the taste of that hot, uber sour (I prefer it with the chili “kick” ) tamarind-flavored broth, and of course the pork meat dipped in fish-sauce with kalamansi (local Filipino lime) or just toyo (soy sauce) and ‘em sliced tiger chilis.

Next is sisig, inihaw na baboy and pork kilawin. Again pork-dishes people. Of course, I don’t eat just any sisig or kilawin…they have to be cooked in a particular way, where the meat (meat? do you even call that meat? ) has this charcoal-broiled first so they have that slightly grilled taste…and NO LIVER…hate ‘em icky-tasting buggers *shivers*. It is such sad that pork is BANNED in this country, I will have to wait til my next vacation (BOO!)

My veggie favorites would be lato (some kind of seaweed thingie) salad, ensalada with dahon ng kamote (sweet potato leaves salad), pinakbet, lumpiang gulay (veggie spring rolls) and of course, kangkong kernitz!

Of course I can cook the veggie dishes here, as for the pork ones, I had tried substituting chicken for pork in the kilawin, complete numminess! I used to cook caldereta at home too, (using mashed liver for the gravy…and not liverspread) and bistek as well, But well, there’s too much of beef in this country that I am sick of it (hubby doesn’t eat much of beef either…except when it’s really, really tender).

So all you Filipino foodies, what are your favorite Filipino Food?

Despite of the fact that I should be writing something about snowmobile exhausts if I want some extra moolahs, I shall not be doing that today…Oh wait…I already put the link…Ohohohhohoho! sorry!

Anyway, Mr. Potporotpotpot (ok fine, just Potpot) had posted a series of questions on a “plurk” thread that he had started related to one of the most-used, sensitive, and in-a-way quite complicated four-letter-word called LOVE. It reminded me about a discussion between one person and myself about the ugly side of romantic love and the things that she told me which was, somewhat true.

Love is a strong emotion, and I believe that sometimes, a person really cannot help falling in love, no matter how complicated their circumstances are and despite of what society dictates or considers as right or wrong. Take for example having an affair with another man or women when one is already married, (Keep to mind, I am talking about real deep emotional involvement here, and not those cases where people are just simply thinking with their lower-body-parts.), or falling in love with a cousin, or those who fall in love to a person way below their social standing, or falling in love with someone you have not met, even falling in love with someone who is emotionally unstable. Most of the time, such scenarios result to hearts being broken not only of the persons involved, but also others who are close to them.

In a situation like this, probably at first, one would not care whether it is wrong or right. As long as your love is being returned, to hell with the rest of the world, right? But eventually the world will force itself on you, whether you like it or not. That is the time when you start wanting, even demanding, things from each other that neither of you can give, you have to start struggling, you have to start fighting for it, you will have to hurt other people who do care for you, you have to start making choices, choices that would eventually have a huge impact to everybody close to you…That is the time when you have to think…Is that love really worth it?

And when you do answer that question, you know that you already had lost something big. Something that had always been a part of you that you just had to give up and you probably not be able to have again for the rest of your life…It can be your parent’s trust…It can be your children’s love….It can be respect that you worked so hard to earn…

Probably falling in love is something someone just could not help. But it takes one to make a decision to take that step…to act out their feelings…to take that plunge that would probably drown you later on.

I’ve always been a sucker for romance and happy endings….

I was (and always is by the way), a lover of fairy-tales. My favorite had always been Cinderella, and other similar stories with a “riches to rags and then back to riches” theme. Of course, they usually involve the handsome Prince Charming who comes and saves the mistreated beauty from her awful predicament.

Gothic romance added to my lot of favorite reads, particularly those written by Victoria Holt. Almost similar, but not quite. The handsome Prince Charming had become the head of a distinguished Cornish family, and the patient, almost-meek and mistreated heroine, had become a lady with noble breeding, or a governess, strong-willed and unyielding to the shadows and dark secrets of the manor.

The “Prince Charming + Happily Ever After” concept, which was the major ingredient of the popular anime Sailormoon, had brought me closer to the world of Japanese animation and manga. I started writing stories then too, and the concept carried through almost all of my fictional works. It was then that I realized that wasn’t really the character of the “Prince Charming” that captivated me all these years, it was the “The Savior, Protector and Avenger” and the “Happily Ever After” part was actually just the preferred ending of love developed between two people, living in almost different worlds, through a meeting set up by chance, or for some people, Fate.

I mean, what are the chances of a member of royalty really inviting all the ladies of the land to his birthday ball? And yet it still happened. And Cinderella, despite of having a difficult life, was able to go and both were able to meet. And then, Prince Charming became her savior, her protector and her avenger…punishing all that had done her wrong.

Back then, I may have not seen myself as a “Cinderella”. However, through my grandmama and grandpapa, I had witnessed the possibility of true love between two people who probably would never had thought that there will be a chance for them to meet at all. He was a son of one of the land-owning families in Leyte, and she, lived all her life in Manila and whose family was so poor (according to her) that she walked barefoot to school. But they did meet, fell inlove and got married. She became the heroine and he became, not only her Prince Charming but her Sworn Protector as well of their own fairy tale—they had their own “happily ever after” ending.

I will not tell how exactly I had met my husband, but we can both assure you that our roads would never had crossed if not because of Chance or Fate or any Divine intervention. We did not meet in Kuwait, I came here to be with him and what actually transpired before that was a series of impossibilities that was made possible. But whether it was Fate or Chance or Divine intervention…For me, I had found my Prince Charming and we are living our own fairy tale…hoping for a “Happily-Ever-After” ending.

I was listening to AZRAEL’s (aka DJ Robin Mendoza in his DJ-ing days) World-Wide-Wave Mix and some of the songs somehow made me reminisce about my elementary and high school days (prom night and debut party mobile new wave remixes anyone?). For a music-lover as myself, there will always be a song that corresponds to a specific memorable moment of my life.

I like all types of music. From classical, pop, country, j-pop, j-rock, alternative, hard rock, gothic, new wave, you name it, I can state a favorite or more. I love singing so much (but I think singing does not love me wahahaha!) that I had even purchased a whole bunch of song books!

I’ve had my share of pop-dance crazes: “Stars”, “Dying Inside” (hides), Ace of Base songs (”I wish I could scream out loudd…that I love you…I wish I could scream to you don’t gooooo…” from Don’t Walk Away), “My Boo”, Whigfield’s “Close to You”,Zoom; new-wave faves: “Bizaar Love Triangle”, “True”, “Upside Down”, “Everytime I See You”.

During my high school and half of my college years, I used to listen to almost everything (EXCEPT FOR APRIL BOY REGINO, THANK GOD!)…Metallica, Pearl Jam, 70’s and early 80’s love songs, jpop, jrock, pop, alternative, and of course, OPM bands. And yes, Boy-band lurrrvv! From a little Menudo(Ricky Martin’s old band) brat that I was, I eventually grew up to a Boyzone and Westlife lover. I remember how heartbroken I was in my 1st (or was it 2nd) year of college when Stephen Gately of Boyzone admitted he was gay…I liked him a lot and well, I felt like all the “decent guys” were just turning gay… My greatest crush back then (he was also a very close high school friend) also went out of his closet a few months before that and I was like…WAHHH!!! WHYYY WAS EVERYBODY JUST TURNING GAAYYYY???!!! Oh well, lots of people change when they go to college. I mean a lot of ‘em considered as high-school losers go and reinvent themselves and some, after their acne skin treatment, sever dieting during the summer vacations, and subjecting themselves to a complete fashion and personality make-over, really succeeded in doing so….then there are those kids who decide it’s time to err… “come out”…Well, it cannot be helped, especially in an “open to anything” environment such as UP. Anyway, the height of my Westlife madness was when I met hubby, since we both can relate to most of their songs…I got over ‘em boy bands but as you can see, I’m still very much into hubby…LoL!

Eventually, I listened more to alternative and alternative rock, emo, metal, hard rock, gothic rock. and jrock. Evanescence and Linkin Park were my favorite bands. Nothing much was happening then, I just finished college and I decided to take a break. I began my nocturnal existence (Ha!) and I spent my time playing Ragnarok Online, staying awake ’til 5am only to wake up at 4pm-5am the same day (except when I had to do some shopping and paperwork). I started wearing ‘em black clothes and never left the house without putting my black lipstick on.

Now that I’m married, I can’t go around wearing ‘em gothic outfits as often as I used to before. However, my choice of music had delved more into classical, gothic metal, symphonic metal, symphonic rock and a bit of dark pop too, mostly with female soprano and/or mermaid-like vocals. But then again, songs with hunting melodies had always fascinated me as early as when I was a child, and it all started when I heard “Falling”, the theme song of a very famous TV serial called Twin Peaks. Remember the song “Five Years” by Sugar Hiccup? I never get tired of listening to that song til now—freakiest lullabye I’ve ever heard…LOVE LOVE LOVE IT! Plus, I keep on discovering other similar songs, like “So Sad” by ‘em Gregorian Chant(ers) and Sister of OZ, and “Song of the Siren” by This Mortal Coil.

As for symphonic and gothic metal, I’m becoming more and more entranced by the “Beauty and the Beast” singing style of Tristania, Sirenia, of the songs from the earlier Theatre of Tragedy albums (whose lyrics were all of Early Modern English…kewlness!) and Leaves Eyes…All of their female vocalists have classical singing backgrounds (most of them are real sopranos), which I think is really amazing. Besides, the lyrics of their songs usually have this “theatrical”, “classic” feel, as if you are reading a fantasy novel.

What about you? Are you a music-lover too?

There was a time that my world for me was like the sound of that very familiar flat-line beep—constant and unchanging, stretched up to what it seems like eternity, until that is, released from it’s lifeless source. My choice of existence was of a peculiar, unnoticeable yet perfected way of disconnection between the world, me, and my inner-self, of which I had kept protected, seldom, if not never, exposed to what I believed to be contaminating essence of “actually living”. I laughed with a lot of people, I smiled at a lot of people, but when I cried, I cried alone, in the darkness where even I cannot even see my own tears, and in silence, that even I cannot hear myself.

And despite of the fact that what I was at that time could probably be explained by a series of psychological babbling (of which, by the way, still amuses me ’til now, so much that I still like researching about it), I will have to say that I was not like those people who thought they were “lost”. I knew what I wanted, I knew what I was in. I did not hate the world. I did not hate myself either. I was just an individual who knew that I feel too much…for anything, anybody, everybody and everything, someone who was trying to protect something that was too fragile that it could easily break.

And you…You forcefully dug me out from whatever darkness I had created for myself. You said, “From now on, you don’t have to protect yourself, I will protect you.” Slowly you flooded my sight with blues, reds and yellows and I never knew until it was already too late—I just found myself helplessly drowning in what was once the grey-coloured desert I had put myself in, and it was terrifying…

But since then, I had always been happy…for the last eight years of my life, I had truly been (and still am) very, very happy. The emptiness that I never even knew existed has been filled. You, who have the ability to speak right to my heart, have broken every-single barrier I had made. Thanks to you, I can cry out loud now, if need be, and I’m not scared of breaking anymore. You kept your promise, you were always there to protect me.

I love you. Happy Anniversary, my love.

…and we’re off to Goa!

I love the place since it has a lot of similarities with the Philippines—century old churches, beaches, warm climate, monsoon seasons, Latin influence (theirs are Portuguese…) and a whole lot more! The people are also very friendly and accommodating, not to mention, more open-minded compared to those of from other Indian states.

The place is quite packed with foreigners —workers, tourists, retirees…I heard there are lots of Israelis, Russians, and yes, lotsa Filipinos too it seems…Last time I went to Goa (which was like 4 years ago), I haven’t seen even one Filipino ANYWHERE! But now, my mom-in-law said that aside from the Filipinas who had married Goans and had settled there, many hotels and posh salons/spas had hired Filipino employees. I’m more excited now because it would reaaaallly be like home then. Plenty of kabayans! Yey!

The only thing with Goa is that the cost of living there is very high. And to think I am so kuripot (cheapskate). And how the people spend! Grrrrr…

Anyway, I was looking at our trolley bags we bought last year for our trip to the Philippines…they’re totally gone…Well, three of them are…So I think we need to get news ones…Pfft…And guess what, that trolley bag I bought in the Philippines when I left for Kuwait 3 years ago? It’s still working perfectly…But then again, that was a Voyeger…I wonder, when can I be able to afford Zero Halliburton luggages to take to Goa? Wahahahaha!!!!!

I don’t think either me, or my husband will ever think of driving a car here in Kuwait. I mean, fine, we can both afford it, and hubby will not have a problem getting a license (despite of the fact that it is VERY HARD to get one..) through the power of, what else? Wasta. But with how many news about road accidents in this country everyday, I feel that it would be MUCH SAFER for us not to have a car. Besides, both our workplaces are not far from the area’s corresponding bus stops and we do not go far away that often.

Honestly speaking, I think, no matter how much of a good driver a person is, driving in Kuwait roads is dangerous. Sure a lot of people do own a car, and a lot of people do drive, but accidents here happen too often, and I do mean TOO OFTEN. And if you are an expat, well, big hassle for you (unless you have a powerful sheik as a sponsor or, more convenient, a friend).

The thing is, most road accidents involves some locals, who, at times, do not care much about traffic regulations. Some do not only think they own the road, they actually act like they own the road. They will speed, swerve, cut, and take-over like there is no tomorrow and well, they do not respect the cops. As for the cops, despite of probably knowing how to speak English, would talk to you in Arabic, and if you don’t know the lingo…well…you will have to call SOMEONE to talk to them…on the other hand, the other person would have probably exchanged pleasantries with the guy, called the cop’s superior which is a friend of an uncle or an aunt or whatever and the rest is history…well, in a worst case scenario, you’ll probably be history.

In this country, car insurance is definitely a must for vehicle-owners. And I’m not being all too paranoid or anything like that, but just being careful just doesn’t cut it here. I mean no matter how careful you are, if the other people who are driving on the same road are maniacs, there is still a huge possibility for you to get involved in some accident right?

Started dozing at work already! Just one more hour and it’s HOME SWEET HOME for me. I do hope that Eid is tomorrow. I have lots of domestic tasks to be done and a 4-day holiday would reaaally help. Besides, I wanna go roaming with hubby too. I would love to visit places that I’ve never been to before.

Hubby said that if tomorrow is Eid, he’ll take me out for dinner! Oh nummie gastronomical ruin that I just cannot resist! The bugger spoils me and I am being fattened up like a turkey to be served for Thanksgiving. I think no matter how much diet pills I drink, I’ll never loose weight at this rate *sighs*. Thing is we’re planning to have a baby and gaining weight will never help :/.

Btw, 7 days more and it’s our wedding anniversary!!! Being weirdos that we are, we gave each other our anniversary gifts na. LoL.

And he ain’t happy AT ALL! Poor Alizarin…Uhm…sorry, poor hubby. He actually lost about 5 seasons of downloaded TV serials and I lost some work files (VERY IMPORTANT WORK FILES) of which I was actually planning to backup today. 

Alizarin is fine now, hubby well…I don’t know.

I have to attend the ITP-K training tomorrow! And to think I really wanna wake up late tomorrow. Oh well, it’s for a good cause. Western Union who are our sponsor, gave away  promotional products (t-shirts and vests, I think, not sure). Yeah, we were featured in Arab Times

And no, you won’t be able to see me in that picture (only my long black hair ). I was actually sitting in front of the speaker, and was then in charge of the visuals and demo coding. See those two guys wearing white caps right at the center? That’s me behind them. Anyway, going to sleep now. Ciao.

I remember when my niece’s Japanese father was so upset upon finding out that his then less-than-a-year-old daughter’s ears were pierced. He said it was very cruel (of her mom) to actually do that to Arisa-chan (my niece). But then of course we just laughed about it and her mom explained that it is actually how it is done in our country since we believe that it would be easier for the girls, and less painful for them to get their ears pierced when the lower ear lobe is still very soft. 

As for me, I got my ears pierced when I was about eight (I think). It was a painful experience, I tell you! We just actually did it at home (in a not so hygenic process) and used some kinda special type of earrings to poke my earlobes. It took almost, every female in that house helping, about more than an hour to get my ears pierced. Talk about major ouch! I did the same process again, on my own when I was 14, but only on my right ear, just because I thought it was really kewl to have two earrings on one ear…

Now, a lot of people are not only opting to have their ears pierced, but also different types of body piercing. My best-friend, got her tongue pierced when we were in college. It looked kewl on her, but I sure ain’t gonna have my tongue pierced too, thank you very much. Actually, aside from earrings,  bangles, and my crosses I’m not much into wearing jewelry, specially body jewelry. I like looking at people who have them though, that is if they don’t overdo it…it would really look scary hehehe…