To Hubby:

timi — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 11:22:39 +0000

There was a time that my world for me was like the sound of that very familiar flat-line beep—constant and unchanging, stretched up to what it seems like eternity, until that is, released from it’s lifeless source. My choice of existence was of a peculiar, unnoticeable yet perfected way of disconnection between the world, me, and my inner-self, of which I had kept protected, seldom, if not never, exposed to what I believed to be contaminating essence of “actually living”. I laughed with a lot of people, I smiled at a lot of people, but when I cried, I cried alone, in the darkness where even I cannot even see my own tears, and in silence, that even I cannot hear myself.

And despite of the fact that what I was at that time could probably be explained by a series of psychological babbling (of which, by the way, still amuses me ’til now, so much that I still like researching about it), I will have to say that I was not like those people who thought they were “lost”. I knew what I wanted, I knew what I was in. I did not hate the world. I did not hate myself either. I was just an individual who knew that I feel too much…for anything, anybody, everybody and everything, someone who was trying to protect something that was too fragile that it could easily break.

And you…You forcefully dug me out from whatever darkness I had created for myself. You said, “From now on, you don’t have to protect yourself, I will protect you.” Slowly you flooded my sight with blues, reds and yellows and I never knew until it was already too late—I just found myself helplessly drowning in what was once the grey-coloured desert I had put myself in, and it was terrifying…

But since then, I had always been happy…for the last eight years of my life, I had truly been (and still am) very, very happy. The emptiness that I never even knew existed has been filled. You, who have the ability to speak right to my heart, have broken every-single barrier I had made. Thanks to you, I can cry out loud now, if need be, and I’m not scared of breaking anymore. You kept your promise, you were always there to protect me.

I love you. Happy Anniversary, my love.

Hubby’s old letter

timi — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 09:45:04 +0000

I was just looking through some old emails and found this letter he had sent me last June 17 last year.

To My Dearest Darling Love,

I would like to start by saying I Love You.

It has been a very long time since I have written to you, and well maybe a long time since you have really heard me say I Love You.

It has been 7 years since we have met and more than 3 years since we have been together, I want to thank you for all that you do.

I do not know if you are aware but I want to thank you for a the following things are much more which I fail to mention below.

1 – Thank you for loving me

2 – Thank you for caring about me.

3 – Thank you for honouring and respecting me

4 – Thank you for all that you do in the house.

5 – Thank you for loving my parents, taking care of their needs.

6 – Thank you for helping out financially with the upkeep of the house and for other expenses.

7 – Thank you for understanding me when I fail to understand myself.

8 – Thank you for being YOU, and thank you for not changing

9 – Thank you for the sacrifices you make for us all.

10 – Thank you for being patient with all the things you have to go through.

11 – Thank you for smiling and comforting me when I am down.

12 – Thank you for holding on to me, even when I am soo tired that I cannot stand on my own.

13 – Thank you for sharing your life with me.

14 – Thank you for waiting for me

15 – Thank you for giving me your love.

16 – Thank you for all the affection and gentleness you show us all at home.

17 – Thank you for taking sense into me when I fail to think straight.

18 – Thank you for all the times you have walked with me when I felt I was walking all alone.

19 – Thank you for the hugs you give me, which keep me warm and make me feel loved.

20 – Thank you for the kisses you give which brighten up my day.

21 – Thank you for enduring the noise and criticism you face soo often at home.

22 – Thank you for not going astray even when there are soo many chances for you to do so.

23 – Thank you for being faithful , even though I am not the best catch in the world.

24 – Thank you for putting up with my sometimes short temper and mood swings.

25 – Thank you for putting up with the mess I make at home.

Remember you are loved by me. I will and forever love you with all my heart and soul and even when I seize to breath on this earth my love for you will forever live in your heart and I will watch over you.

You are the best thing that happened to me, the best thing that is going for me right now and the best thing that will be.

I thank the good Lord for you every single day, and I pray for your safety, happiness and well being every single day.

You are precious, and one of a kind.

There maybe millions of beautiful women in the world, but truly none compare to you. I am sure I can find people with all your good characteristics, but not all of the characteristics in one single person.

I Love You

Lots of Love, Hugs and Kisses

Your Hubby

Sanju

He’s such a sweet bugger isn’t he?

Crimson Heavens » letter

To Hubby:

Hubby’s old letter